Fears

Today my jet just taxied down the concrete runways of my neighborhood. See yesterday's blog if you are wondering what I'm talking about.

We live less than 5 miles from the airport so the jets taking off usually go right over our neighborhood. I always look up when I'm outside to gaze at the awesomeness of something that large being in air. Of course I wonder where the travelers are going? Most flights go to Houston or Dallas first as there's only a couple of direct flights from here to Los Angles, Las Vegas and Atlanta. The second reason I look up is to make sure that the luggage compartment door has not let loose and it's "raining" suitcases or chunks of frozen waste water. I know, call me "chicken little" and the "sky is falling in." Through the years, I have seen articles or heard news about pieces coming from planes & hitting people or houses. I probably have a better chance of winning the lottery than getting hit by anything from a plane, but you never know! What if?

Some people may say I have a "fear," but I choose to call it "cautiousness." It got me thinking of what fears I do have. Like my sisters, I have a fear of snakes. I have somewhat conquered that by forcing myself to watch TV shows about them without closing my eyes. However, I DID NOT see the movie, Snakes on a Plane; that would be a little too much for me.

I have a fear of falling and a fear of drowning. I love high places where there is no real threat to falling, but get me 4 feet off the ground in a rickety ladder and I start shaking. I love the water and as long as someone is not pulling or pushing me under the water, I'm fine. These fears have been with me for years, probably precipitated by almost drowning and falling down stairs at the age of two years.

A "fear" that I have that I don't talk about with anyone is the fear of what actions I will succumb to when I lose weight and get in shape? From the age of 21 - 31 years I was quite promiscuous and I have always had this fear that if I got back to my original healthy weight of those days, that I would become that person again. I'm sure there are people reading this that would say, "No way! Unfounded fear!" Maybe? I can use all the logic that I can muster to try and forget any of my fears, but when the pedal-hits-the-metal, I am shaking. Regretfully, fears are not always logical, they are often just there. Just there to bug us now & then. Make us wonder, what if?