"Leaving on a jet plane".... tomorrow that is! Going on vacation for 9 days. I will try to see if there is a computer around to blog, but you never know. We're going to the "wilds" of the USA, Utah, Idaho, Montana and Wyoming. Plan to see national parks and take lots of photos.
This is the first vacation that I have not really tried to lose weight for it. You know, lose weight for those big events... weddings, reunions, vacations, etc. Then it's back to reality and the weight comes back on and plus some weight, which often happens.
My focus leading up to this vacation has been in healthy eating and exercising. I know they have roads/streets up there to walk so I should be able to get a mile or two in every day. Plus many hotels have an exercise room, maybe I'll try something different. It will be fun!
Food and eating is a concern as my brain seems to also go on vacation and "logic" stays home. We'll see how we do. I will catch up on all details when I get back! Peace!
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Plan to Balance
Here's a quote from Guideposts magazine that Robin Miller, from the Food Network, wrote:
"In my career, writing cookbooks and eventually appearing on television, I was determined to help people develop healthy relationships with food. There are no 'taboo' foods - unless you have a medical condition that requires a special diet, like diabetes. Otherwise, it's all about balance. And balance isn't the same as control. I eat lots of vegetables and fruit. I believe it's essential to exercise and eat healthy. But it's impossible to do that if you feel anxiety about food. You should love your food! People often ask me what they should cut out of their diet. 'Nothing,' I say. 'Take longer walks instead.'"
I think that there is a lot of wisdom in this message. I have been expressing basically the same concept for weeks now. I have not called my lifestyle change a "diet" because that word/concept gets me feeling anxious about my food. The thought of "diet" brings on feeling of deprivation, then despair - "I want that, why can't I have that?"
BUT I am beginning to realize that in my "balancing" of food, I need to eat less of certain foods or cut them out of my food plan entirely in order to LOSE weight. Yes, food is not "taboo," however, some foods may be "triggers." Triggers to our system and psyche to eat more. For some people it may be sweets, others it's flour, others it's meat..... the list can go on and on! Some of us may know right off the bat what our trigger food is, others of us discover as we go forward. I gave up my nightly snack of ice cream as soon as I started this lifestyle change. I thought it would be a struggle, however after the first week, I have hardly missed it. However, the "nightly snack" habit is still a thorn in my side. Lately, I have been having mixed nuts. Now, I know that nuts are a healthy snack for fiber, they are not "taboo." However, one nut equals twenty nuts for me. I can't have just one. Nuts are a trigger for me.... to want more. Even if I measure out the nuts for recording fat grams and calories, I will still go and get more. It's a food that I need to avoid or cut out of my diet.
DIET Die-it That food needs to die (go away) from it - my food plan!
Another thing I have realized in my own life and now in reading emails from others is how much an effect the lack of planning has on our lifestyle, our eating habits, and our ability to make changes in our life - such as lose weight. Before I know it, I have chowed-down this or that, then the remorse comes later or the insight comes later. Remorse may be a strong word, but it seems appropriate many times. Remorse may be the the basis of bulimia. The insight becomes a questioning of myself. Why can't I THINK before I act (eat)? Why can't I PLAN instead of being compulsive?
Compulsiveness is the basis for the need of groups such as Overeaters Anonymous or Alcoholics Anonymous. Yes, I have tried Overeaters Anonymous, but I did not recognize my own compulsiveness as I was rejecting their concept of "obsessiveness." I don't eat a whole bag of chips, cookies, pasta, etc, etc.... in one setting.
Getting back to my original thought, PLANNING takes work. It takes effort. It's sometimes much easier to fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants and EAT whatever we want (i.e. compulsiveness). Planning is the basis of balance ... which is what I think the author, Robin Miller, was promoting in the quote above. By planning my food, I can determine and decide to have a balance of foods. This plan or balance may include more of one type of foods and less of another. Each person is different so I can't determine any one's food plan other than my own. It has been trial and error for me and I'm still learning.
Peace!
"In my career, writing cookbooks and eventually appearing on television, I was determined to help people develop healthy relationships with food. There are no 'taboo' foods - unless you have a medical condition that requires a special diet, like diabetes. Otherwise, it's all about balance. And balance isn't the same as control. I eat lots of vegetables and fruit. I believe it's essential to exercise and eat healthy. But it's impossible to do that if you feel anxiety about food. You should love your food! People often ask me what they should cut out of their diet. 'Nothing,' I say. 'Take longer walks instead.'"
I think that there is a lot of wisdom in this message. I have been expressing basically the same concept for weeks now. I have not called my lifestyle change a "diet" because that word/concept gets me feeling anxious about my food. The thought of "diet" brings on feeling of deprivation, then despair - "I want that, why can't I have that?"
BUT I am beginning to realize that in my "balancing" of food, I need to eat less of certain foods or cut them out of my food plan entirely in order to LOSE weight. Yes, food is not "taboo," however, some foods may be "triggers." Triggers to our system and psyche to eat more. For some people it may be sweets, others it's flour, others it's meat..... the list can go on and on! Some of us may know right off the bat what our trigger food is, others of us discover as we go forward. I gave up my nightly snack of ice cream as soon as I started this lifestyle change. I thought it would be a struggle, however after the first week, I have hardly missed it. However, the "nightly snack" habit is still a thorn in my side. Lately, I have been having mixed nuts. Now, I know that nuts are a healthy snack for fiber, they are not "taboo." However, one nut equals twenty nuts for me. I can't have just one. Nuts are a trigger for me.... to want more. Even if I measure out the nuts for recording fat grams and calories, I will still go and get more. It's a food that I need to avoid or cut out of my diet.
DIET Die-it That food needs to die (go away) from it - my food plan!
Another thing I have realized in my own life and now in reading emails from others is how much an effect the lack of planning has on our lifestyle, our eating habits, and our ability to make changes in our life - such as lose weight. Before I know it, I have chowed-down this or that, then the remorse comes later or the insight comes later. Remorse may be a strong word, but it seems appropriate many times. Remorse may be the the basis of bulimia. The insight becomes a questioning of myself. Why can't I THINK before I act (eat)? Why can't I PLAN instead of being compulsive?
Compulsiveness is the basis for the need of groups such as Overeaters Anonymous or Alcoholics Anonymous. Yes, I have tried Overeaters Anonymous, but I did not recognize my own compulsiveness as I was rejecting their concept of "obsessiveness." I don't eat a whole bag of chips, cookies, pasta, etc, etc.... in one setting.
Getting back to my original thought, PLANNING takes work. It takes effort. It's sometimes much easier to fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants and EAT whatever we want (i.e. compulsiveness). Planning is the basis of balance ... which is what I think the author, Robin Miller, was promoting in the quote above. By planning my food, I can determine and decide to have a balance of foods. This plan or balance may include more of one type of foods and less of another. Each person is different so I can't determine any one's food plan other than my own. It has been trial and error for me and I'm still learning.
Peace!
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Catching up
There is a word to describe a stop or slow-down in weight loss, it's called a "plateau." I have come up with a different phrase, I'm calling it "catching-up." My physical, emotional & spiritual selves are catching up with the whirlwind journey I have embarked on. It seems that everything has been going fast, including weight loss. Emotions have been flying around me and in my head for weeks now, many expressed here in this blog.
The past couple of weeks, I have needed to catch-up with everything. Slow down the thoughts and emotions, which means blogging/writing less. Slow down the weight loss, which means eating more. Not really eating a whole lot more, I'm maintaining. I feel like I needed my skin to catch up on the weight loss, so I don't have to have a tummy tuck later. That may sound crazy and perhaps sounds like an excuse, but I'm OK with this slow-down. Granted I want to lose more weight and I will.
I realize that I need to have a "burning desire" to lose weight more than my burning desire to eat certain foods. I have to remind myself, "I know what that (food) tastes like so I don't need to have that food right now." I may decide later or tomorrow to have that food, BUT right now I don't need it, I know what it tastes like. A desire is something or someone we want so badly, that it hurts just thinking about not having it in our life. It burns us, it brands us.
What burning desire do we each submit or give in to? Is it appropriate for our life? Is it healthy for us? What catching up do we each need for our life?
Peace!
The past couple of weeks, I have needed to catch-up with everything. Slow down the thoughts and emotions, which means blogging/writing less. Slow down the weight loss, which means eating more. Not really eating a whole lot more, I'm maintaining. I feel like I needed my skin to catch up on the weight loss, so I don't have to have a tummy tuck later. That may sound crazy and perhaps sounds like an excuse, but I'm OK with this slow-down. Granted I want to lose more weight and I will.
I realize that I need to have a "burning desire" to lose weight more than my burning desire to eat certain foods. I have to remind myself, "I know what that (food) tastes like so I don't need to have that food right now." I may decide later or tomorrow to have that food, BUT right now I don't need it, I know what it tastes like. A desire is something or someone we want so badly, that it hurts just thinking about not having it in our life. It burns us, it brands us.
What burning desire do we each submit or give in to? Is it appropriate for our life? Is it healthy for us? What catching up do we each need for our life?
Peace!
Monday, August 27, 2007
Darkness & Doubt
I read with interest the article that describes Mother Teresa's decades-long battle with darkness, doubt and spiritual drought. Who would have thought? I was certainly surprised.
I am certain that most of us would doubt the existence of a loving God if we, like her, had witnessed all the poverty, illness and starvation in India. Yet she continued to serve God's people throughout her life. What a noble woman!
I agree with the people that think that her letters should be made public, it has already brought inspiration to me. To think that a woman-of-God, who dedicated her life to serving God by serving humans, had cries of anguish and could be honest about her thoughts and feelings is remarkable. What a remarkable woman!
Mother Teresa was honest with God. In my previous blog entries I have expressed my doubts and spiritual drought, and I gather comfort in the fact that I am not alone in these experiences. It reminds me of an old motto, "Christians are not perfect, just forgiven." What a powerful word.... forgiven. If we confess our sins to God, we will be forgiven. The slate of sin is wiped clean.
Mother Teresa was not perfect. What a human woman! May this "human" side of her open up the dialogue for doubters like me to express & feel God's love in the forgiveness. May this "human" side of her open up the windows and doors to shed light on my darkness. May this "human" side of her open up the dams of refreshing water to rid my life of spiritual drought. May the experiences of Mother Teresa open up our hearts and minds to God's love.
Peace.
I am certain that most of us would doubt the existence of a loving God if we, like her, had witnessed all the poverty, illness and starvation in India. Yet she continued to serve God's people throughout her life. What a noble woman!
I agree with the people that think that her letters should be made public, it has already brought inspiration to me. To think that a woman-of-God, who dedicated her life to serving God by serving humans, had cries of anguish and could be honest about her thoughts and feelings is remarkable. What a remarkable woman!
Mother Teresa was honest with God. In my previous blog entries I have expressed my doubts and spiritual drought, and I gather comfort in the fact that I am not alone in these experiences. It reminds me of an old motto, "Christians are not perfect, just forgiven." What a powerful word.... forgiven. If we confess our sins to God, we will be forgiven. The slate of sin is wiped clean.
Mother Teresa was not perfect. What a human woman! May this "human" side of her open up the dialogue for doubters like me to express & feel God's love in the forgiveness. May this "human" side of her open up the windows and doors to shed light on my darkness. May this "human" side of her open up the dams of refreshing water to rid my life of spiritual drought. May the experiences of Mother Teresa open up our hearts and minds to God's love.
Peace.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Doing a double take
Sorry about the duplicate posts from this morning & last night! For some reason I could not get my Friday's entry to post, so I re-wrote it this morning & when I "published" this morning's entry, both of them published. I really don't like seeing me "double." But I'm not computer-savvy enough to know how to delete one of them.
I do notice on my current picture that my double chin is not as prominent. There's hope for me yet! Peace
I do notice on my current picture that my double chin is not as prominent. There's hope for me yet! Peace
Happy Day!
In honor of my 10% weight loss. I ordered myself a matching skirt and top and then another top all in a smaller size. I thought that I may have to hang them up in my closet for incentive, but they all fit. YEA! Happy Day!
Thanks to all who read this blog and have given me so much encouragement to continue on this journey. You comments and e-mails mean a lot to me Peace!
Friday, August 24, 2007
Happy Day!
In honor of my 10% weight loss, I ordered myself a matching skirt & top and then another top all in a smaller size. Received them today & I thought that I may have to hang them up for incentive, but it all fit. YEA! Happy Day!
Thanks to all who read this blog & have given me so much encouragement to continue on this journey. Your comments and e-mails mean a lot to me. Peace!
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Advise
Happy Birthday to me! Happy birthday to me! You can't tell that I'm a "Leo" and like attention, can you? Today is my 56th birthday. Guess I'd better change my blog introduction. Anyway I feel 76, maybe even 86. I'm tired & I am either hungry or suffering from indigestion. How does a person know?
Do you ever wonder what a certain age ahead really feels like? I do. When I was 36, I'm sure I wondered what 56 would feel like. What would I be doing? Where would I be living? Would I be married to "hubby"? Would we still be together? Would I be healthy? If I remember right, I weighed about 25-30 pounds less 20 years ago?
I read about a mental & emotional exercise to do... Imagine that you are 18 years old and you have to give yourself some advise or words of wisdom from yourself, a 56 year old, for example. That's a tough one. I have professed for years that one of my mottoes is "Look before you leap, but take that leap." I still have to say that's true. Take the time to look before you leap into a job, relationship or move, but if there is no outstanding obstacles, take the leap. Enjoy the free-fall!
Another one of my mottoes is.... "You always make the right decision, at the time." In other words, when you make a decision, you believe it's right, or for the best decision at that time. It may turn out later, that a better decision could have been made... but at that time, it was the right decision. Enjoy the ride!
I guess life is sometimes like a parachute fall and then landing in a roller-coaster. First you wonder if you're going to survive, then you wonder if you want to survive. But survive we do, until it's our time to go from this earth. Enjoy life! Peace!
Do you ever wonder what a certain age ahead really feels like? I do. When I was 36, I'm sure I wondered what 56 would feel like. What would I be doing? Where would I be living? Would I be married to "hubby"? Would we still be together? Would I be healthy? If I remember right, I weighed about 25-30 pounds less 20 years ago?
I read about a mental & emotional exercise to do... Imagine that you are 18 years old and you have to give yourself some advise or words of wisdom from yourself, a 56 year old, for example. That's a tough one. I have professed for years that one of my mottoes is "Look before you leap, but take that leap." I still have to say that's true. Take the time to look before you leap into a job, relationship or move, but if there is no outstanding obstacles, take the leap. Enjoy the free-fall!
Another one of my mottoes is.... "You always make the right decision, at the time." In other words, when you make a decision, you believe it's right, or for the best decision at that time. It may turn out later, that a better decision could have been made... but at that time, it was the right decision. Enjoy the ride!
I guess life is sometimes like a parachute fall and then landing in a roller-coaster. First you wonder if you're going to survive, then you wonder if you want to survive. But survive we do, until it's our time to go from this earth. Enjoy life! Peace!
Monday, August 20, 2007
Buddies
I have quite a few "buddies," best friends in my life. I also call them "sisters," although some of them of are only sisters of the heart. However, my sisters of my family are my buddies too! How lucky can a person get?
I have six sisters and one brother. I am the oldest and the youngest two (twins) are seventeen years younger than me. There were a few times that strangers would mistake me for their mother when they were infants. My sisters and I have an annual weekend get-away to have fun, laugh, cry and shop. We usually go to a different location every year because we get quite rowdy. We laugh hardily and loud, so we always get a stand-alone cabin or house to stay in so that we don't disturb the neighbors. Anyway, we have had 8 weekends & this October will be our ninth WWW. WWW stands for Wild Women's Weekend. I think that name got started about our 3rd annual weekend when I found these pins for all my sisters that said "Wild Women Don't Get the Blues."
There are some in our family that are "wilder" than the others, and that would be the five oldest. Somehow the wild genes in the family dissipated when it got to the twins. Maybe because mother was actually on birth control for three plus years before they were conceived. Maybe because there was actually a break in the action (births in the family) by four years between them and their next oldest sister. Maybe because they (the twins) saw all the trouble we older ones got into and caused. The twins actually act their age unlike the rest of us!
Anyway I have gotten off the subject a bit, but I consider the twins my buddies. Robyn reminded me that when they were seniors in high school, I had moved back home from California and stayed with my parents and them until I figured out where I was going to work and live. That fall of 1985 we three would get up and go walking about a mile and a half before they headed to school. We would swing our arms and pretend to be grabbing an imaginary good-looking guy in front of us.... his TUSH! "Tush, tush, tush," we would repeat as we swung our arms. We probably never got up our speed of the walk, because we'd start laughing.
My walking buddies and I are walking again. Robyn is in central Wisconsin, Raylene is in northern Wisconsin and I am in southern Texas. Thanks to email, we are going to report to one another about our walk/run every day. We're going to be accountable to one another on our exercise and our food. It should be interesting. I think I'm going to imagine Tom Selleck's tush in front of me.... OOOO WEEEE! You can't stop me now!
Oh, that's right, I'm married. Sorry, hubby, I can grab your tush anytime. Let the Wild Woman in me not get the blues! Peace.
I have six sisters and one brother. I am the oldest and the youngest two (twins) are seventeen years younger than me. There were a few times that strangers would mistake me for their mother when they were infants. My sisters and I have an annual weekend get-away to have fun, laugh, cry and shop. We usually go to a different location every year because we get quite rowdy. We laugh hardily and loud, so we always get a stand-alone cabin or house to stay in so that we don't disturb the neighbors. Anyway, we have had 8 weekends & this October will be our ninth WWW. WWW stands for Wild Women's Weekend. I think that name got started about our 3rd annual weekend when I found these pins for all my sisters that said "Wild Women Don't Get the Blues."
There are some in our family that are "wilder" than the others, and that would be the five oldest. Somehow the wild genes in the family dissipated when it got to the twins. Maybe because mother was actually on birth control for three plus years before they were conceived. Maybe because there was actually a break in the action (births in the family) by four years between them and their next oldest sister. Maybe because they (the twins) saw all the trouble we older ones got into and caused. The twins actually act their age unlike the rest of us!
Anyway I have gotten off the subject a bit, but I consider the twins my buddies. Robyn reminded me that when they were seniors in high school, I had moved back home from California and stayed with my parents and them until I figured out where I was going to work and live. That fall of 1985 we three would get up and go walking about a mile and a half before they headed to school. We would swing our arms and pretend to be grabbing an imaginary good-looking guy in front of us.... his TUSH! "Tush, tush, tush," we would repeat as we swung our arms. We probably never got up our speed of the walk, because we'd start laughing.
My walking buddies and I are walking again. Robyn is in central Wisconsin, Raylene is in northern Wisconsin and I am in southern Texas. Thanks to email, we are going to report to one another about our walk/run every day. We're going to be accountable to one another on our exercise and our food. It should be interesting. I think I'm going to imagine Tom Selleck's tush in front of me.... OOOO WEEEE! You can't stop me now!
Oh, that's right, I'm married. Sorry, hubby, I can grab your tush anytime. Let the Wild Woman in me not get the blues! Peace.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Donation
Let me say this upfront, I am a selfish person. I do not donate items to food shelves. I do not donate time to worthy causes. Basically, I do not donate much of anything unless I might get some thing in return such as in a raffle. For three years hubby & I donated almost every Friday night to help run a meat raffle so that we could raise money for our lake sportsman's club. The money was used for scholarships for area graduates. The main reason I stuck with that for that long was because I could drink beer while I was "working" and when I bought a paddle (ticket), I might win some meat for the freezer.
I have felt guilty about not donating more, especially to food shelves. I think every church we have been involved in has asked for donations to the local food shelves and I seldom have brought anything. I usually forget until it's the Sunday for contributions. Even my previous employer asked for canned goods just before our annual Christmas party. I always remembered to bring food then because I would get an extra ticket for the prize raffle. I told you I am selfish!
So, I think hubby was surprised when I told him a few weeks back that "when I lose 10% of my weight, I'm going to donate that many pounds of food for the food shelf at church." Two weeks ago, it was announced that this Sunday's contributions should be canned meat. I knew that I was close to my 10% goal, so I started thinking of what I could get.... canned ham, tuna, chicken, etc. Friday night I went to the store and I bought my canned meat. It took a lot of cans to make up the number of pounds that I lost. It almost looked ridiculous in my shopping cart. So today I brought them into church. I told hubby that I wanted to bring all these cans into church so that I would know how much more I weighed just 8 weeks ago. Granted, there some extra weight for the cans, but those cans of meat were down right heavy! I know people could probably see the strain on my face of carrying them and of course, hubby looked kind of foolish walking in with nothing in his hands. But I did it! I carried those cans of meat and thought of all that extra weight I carried around day after day just 8 weeks ago.
I found myself looking forward to the next 10% and being able to donate twice as much as I did today. Heck, it felt so good donating, maybe I'll start doing that type of thing more often. Peace!
I have felt guilty about not donating more, especially to food shelves. I think every church we have been involved in has asked for donations to the local food shelves and I seldom have brought anything. I usually forget until it's the Sunday for contributions. Even my previous employer asked for canned goods just before our annual Christmas party. I always remembered to bring food then because I would get an extra ticket for the prize raffle. I told you I am selfish!
So, I think hubby was surprised when I told him a few weeks back that "when I lose 10% of my weight, I'm going to donate that many pounds of food for the food shelf at church." Two weeks ago, it was announced that this Sunday's contributions should be canned meat. I knew that I was close to my 10% goal, so I started thinking of what I could get.... canned ham, tuna, chicken, etc. Friday night I went to the store and I bought my canned meat. It took a lot of cans to make up the number of pounds that I lost. It almost looked ridiculous in my shopping cart. So today I brought them into church. I told hubby that I wanted to bring all these cans into church so that I would know how much more I weighed just 8 weeks ago. Granted, there some extra weight for the cans, but those cans of meat were down right heavy! I know people could probably see the strain on my face of carrying them and of course, hubby looked kind of foolish walking in with nothing in his hands. But I did it! I carried those cans of meat and thought of all that extra weight I carried around day after day just 8 weeks ago.
I found myself looking forward to the next 10% and being able to donate twice as much as I did today. Heck, it felt so good donating, maybe I'll start doing that type of thing more often. Peace!
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Cry
I cried. I ended yesterday's blog with admission that I cried. I ended it that way, not to evoke sympathy. I ended it that way to acknowledge that I am human. Sometimes, I have to remind even myself of that fact. I seldom cry and yesterday's cry was nothing more than some tears coming down my face to mix with the sweat and a couple of gasps (or grasps) for breath. It was over almost before it started. It was nothing more than that in the physical sense, but something more in the spiritual sense. Note: I did not write emotional sense, I wrote spiritual.
It was a cry of sadness, it was a cry of resignation, it was a cry of desperation. I am not sure what it all signifies. Perhaps humility or humbleness. Perhaps a realization of aspects of me that I'm not proud. Perhaps none of the above.
I have a goal in mind of a weight on the scale that I think will be indicative of healthy and fit "Rayna." It's a hefty goal in the aspect that it will entail losing 30% of my starting body weight.
I am a thinker and a reader. I think a lot, therefore I am sometimes a creative writer, sometimes not. But I have noticed that I am thinking about this lifestyle change and weight loss change .... way too much! It invades my thoughts & space way too much. I awake in the morning and I'm immediately wondering how I will do today with my changes, with my food intake, with my weight. Granted, I should be thinking MORE before I eat spontaneously, in order to make wiser food choices. But other times, I do need to relax and not think. I need to be able to give my body and mind a rest from thinking. I'm trying so hard, it's exhausting at the same time as it's exhilarating.
This blog is a creative outlet for me to express my thoughts and feelings. However, one thought begot another thought. Before I know it, my head is swimming in thoughts that I think that I have to get out on paper (in the computer). It's a release to write, because I get my thoughts out, I can relax and go on with my day. Or as in today's case, I can go back to bed to catch some more sleep-eye. Part of me thinks that I should stop this blog as the more I blog, the more I think and as I wrote earlier, thinking is exhausting. Part of me.... needs to stop rambling and ................ PEACE be with you!
It was a cry of sadness, it was a cry of resignation, it was a cry of desperation. I am not sure what it all signifies. Perhaps humility or humbleness. Perhaps a realization of aspects of me that I'm not proud. Perhaps none of the above.
I have a goal in mind of a weight on the scale that I think will be indicative of healthy and fit "Rayna." It's a hefty goal in the aspect that it will entail losing 30% of my starting body weight.
I am a thinker and a reader. I think a lot, therefore I am sometimes a creative writer, sometimes not. But I have noticed that I am thinking about this lifestyle change and weight loss change .... way too much! It invades my thoughts & space way too much. I awake in the morning and I'm immediately wondering how I will do today with my changes, with my food intake, with my weight. Granted, I should be thinking MORE before I eat spontaneously, in order to make wiser food choices. But other times, I do need to relax and not think. I need to be able to give my body and mind a rest from thinking. I'm trying so hard, it's exhausting at the same time as it's exhilarating.
This blog is a creative outlet for me to express my thoughts and feelings. However, one thought begot another thought. Before I know it, my head is swimming in thoughts that I think that I have to get out on paper (in the computer). It's a release to write, because I get my thoughts out, I can relax and go on with my day. Or as in today's case, I can go back to bed to catch some more sleep-eye. Part of me thinks that I should stop this blog as the more I blog, the more I think and as I wrote earlier, thinking is exhausting. Part of me.... needs to stop rambling and ................ PEACE be with you!
Friday, August 17, 2007
Team Meeting
There was a PES Project team meeting this morning and here are the minutes of the meeting.
P= Physical, E=Emotional, S= Spiritual
5:17 am Meeting began
S= OK Rayna, time to get up and get walking. You know you will feel energized once you do.
5:18 am Rayna gets on scale and has gained 2#
5:22 am Team starts walking
P= I am going to start this meeting with a complaint. Everyone looks at me like I'm the "bad guy" when she (Rayna) gains weight, but who's out there 6 days a week walking in the morning. Me! You girls are sabotaging me.
E= What do you mean? I'm helping her celebrate her loses of weight. She deserves to celebrate, doesn't she?
S= Yes, but we're not helping if we don't make her act with reason. I am trying to feed her with thoughts of hope and possibility.
E= Well, Rayna has always been a wayward, strong-willed, out of control child. What else do we expect other than this journey will be a roller-coaster ride, up and down? Besides that, why can't she have a snack or treat now and then? She deserves it.
P= Emotional, you are as up and down as Rayna's weight and her compliance to this project. One day you're high on hope and celebrating and the next day you're whining. You need to get with the program here.
E= Everybody else gets to eat what they want and still be trim and fit, why can't Rayna?
S= No, everybody does not eat all the snacks, sweets and fatty foods that they want. Look around you, most trim and fit people eat small portions, lots of healthy foods like salads, veggies and fruits. We need to be the voices of reason for Rayna. We need to work together on this project.
More discussion of the same was held.
6:11 am
P= OK girls, we're almost home. Let's agree to march together. 1, 2, 3, march, march, march! Girls we're going for one more lap, we're going to make it 3 miles today!
S= Whoa! We didn't stop for our water break to refresh us!
E= Wait a minute, we're supposed to go home after 2.5 miles. This is no fair. I'm tired of this meeting. I want to go home, I'm going to cry!
2.6 miles Rayna cried.
P= Physical, E=Emotional, S= Spiritual
5:17 am Meeting began
S= OK Rayna, time to get up and get walking. You know you will feel energized once you do.
5:18 am Rayna gets on scale and has gained 2#
5:22 am Team starts walking
P= I am going to start this meeting with a complaint. Everyone looks at me like I'm the "bad guy" when she (Rayna) gains weight, but who's out there 6 days a week walking in the morning. Me! You girls are sabotaging me.
E= What do you mean? I'm helping her celebrate her loses of weight. She deserves to celebrate, doesn't she?
S= Yes, but we're not helping if we don't make her act with reason. I am trying to feed her with thoughts of hope and possibility.
E= Well, Rayna has always been a wayward, strong-willed, out of control child. What else do we expect other than this journey will be a roller-coaster ride, up and down? Besides that, why can't she have a snack or treat now and then? She deserves it.
P= Emotional, you are as up and down as Rayna's weight and her compliance to this project. One day you're high on hope and celebrating and the next day you're whining. You need to get with the program here.
E= Everybody else gets to eat what they want and still be trim and fit, why can't Rayna?
S= No, everybody does not eat all the snacks, sweets and fatty foods that they want. Look around you, most trim and fit people eat small portions, lots of healthy foods like salads, veggies and fruits. We need to be the voices of reason for Rayna. We need to work together on this project.
More discussion of the same was held.
6:11 am
P= OK girls, we're almost home. Let's agree to march together. 1, 2, 3, march, march, march! Girls we're going for one more lap, we're going to make it 3 miles today!
S= Whoa! We didn't stop for our water break to refresh us!
E= Wait a minute, we're supposed to go home after 2.5 miles. This is no fair. I'm tired of this meeting. I want to go home, I'm going to cry!
2.6 miles Rayna cried.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Results
I did have a lot of my blood levels tested and though my cholesterol is about the same as 6 months ago, which is not totally discouraging as it was not bad then. I am encouraged that my glucose went down to normal instead of being high. I feel very good about that as my dad has diabetes, discovered in the past few years.
I did it!
I have lost 10% of my body weight. I feel more energized as I am walking two and half miles daily. My clothes are fitting better. I think I will get a blood test done to see if my levels have improved.
Peace be with you!
Peace be with you!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Do as I say, not as I do!
I'm a great one for giving advice. I'm the oldest of eight and I have been known to be bossy in my day(s). Sometimes, I do keep quiet and sit back and not say a word...... Oops, I hear my sisters and brother saying "What? Rayna keeping her mouth shut? Hardly!" Yes, the cat is out of the bag, I'm guilty.
Yes, I'm guilty again. This weekend I was telling a sister to tell her son to do this, not to this, etc. Giving advise that was not requested or required. When I got off the phone, I realized that my blood pressure was elevated and that I had been talking too loudly, I'm sure. And the loudness probably had nothing to do with the road noise in the car. I have a "motherly" instinct in me that wants to protect the young ones and the old ones (siblings that are messing with their lives). I don't want them to make the same mistakes that I have made. I want goodness and gladness for them all, family members young and old. I have even been known to boss my own mother.
I like to give advice, that's probably why I enjoy doing this blog. There is no doubt that sometimes I suffer from the "I want to shake some sense into them" syndrome. Why can't they see it my way? I know what I'm talking about... I have the education, experience, entitlement, etc, etc! Another E word, I also get emotional about it! I started thinking about my conversation with my sister and I was humiliated and humbled. I realized that no one could have "shaken sense" into me at my nephew's age, much less 8 years older. I don't want others to make mistakes and then suffer the consequences of their action or lack of action. Sometimes those consequences take years to deal with and/or eliminate from a person's life.
Sometime in this past month's blogging, I mentioned about no one confronting me about my weight. Upon looking back, I wonder did it mean that no one cared if I was eating myself to death? I wonder if I would have accepted what they suggested or said? The answer to both those questions is "No." People do care, just like I care about others and I don't want to see them hurt, be it physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and/or financially.
For me there is a fine-line between showing my care and concern for someone and sticking-my-nose-where-it-don't-belong syndrome. How do others deal with it? Praying for the person. Writing to the person. Listening to the person. For me it is often easier to try and "save" someone else than it is to try and save myself from destruction. Maybe I have more confidence in the other person listening to me and taking my advice than it is for me to act on my own words. It's much easier to shout, "Do as I say, not as I do!"
Advice is easy to give, not so easy to take. Peace!
Yes, I'm guilty again. This weekend I was telling a sister to tell her son to do this, not to this, etc. Giving advise that was not requested or required. When I got off the phone, I realized that my blood pressure was elevated and that I had been talking too loudly, I'm sure. And the loudness probably had nothing to do with the road noise in the car. I have a "motherly" instinct in me that wants to protect the young ones and the old ones (siblings that are messing with their lives). I don't want them to make the same mistakes that I have made. I want goodness and gladness for them all, family members young and old. I have even been known to boss my own mother.
I like to give advice, that's probably why I enjoy doing this blog. There is no doubt that sometimes I suffer from the "I want to shake some sense into them" syndrome. Why can't they see it my way? I know what I'm talking about... I have the education, experience, entitlement, etc, etc! Another E word, I also get emotional about it! I started thinking about my conversation with my sister and I was humiliated and humbled. I realized that no one could have "shaken sense" into me at my nephew's age, much less 8 years older. I don't want others to make mistakes and then suffer the consequences of their action or lack of action. Sometimes those consequences take years to deal with and/or eliminate from a person's life.
Sometime in this past month's blogging, I mentioned about no one confronting me about my weight. Upon looking back, I wonder did it mean that no one cared if I was eating myself to death? I wonder if I would have accepted what they suggested or said? The answer to both those questions is "No." People do care, just like I care about others and I don't want to see them hurt, be it physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and/or financially.
For me there is a fine-line between showing my care and concern for someone and sticking-my-nose-where-it-don't-belong syndrome. How do others deal with it? Praying for the person. Writing to the person. Listening to the person. For me it is often easier to try and "save" someone else than it is to try and save myself from destruction. Maybe I have more confidence in the other person listening to me and taking my advice than it is for me to act on my own words. It's much easier to shout, "Do as I say, not as I do!"
Advice is easy to give, not so easy to take. Peace!
Monday, August 13, 2007
Blessings
Today is a day that I celebrate the blessing of marrying a good man nineteen years ago. Right now he is taking his nightly nap while holding the remote control and "watching" TV with his eyes shut. Yes he is older now & should be allowed these privileges, however, he's been doing this for 19 years! :) I just have to smile and be thankful he's home with me and not out and about. Yes, thankfulness can lift a person's spirits.
Too often we forget all the things we have to be thankful for. Just today, I was talking with a co-worker about walking in the morning. She has little energy at the end of the day to walk as we keep her a very busy woman at work as our department receptionist and go-for person. I mentioned walking in the morning, but she has a four year old to get up and get ready for school. I know she is thankful for that little guy and truthfully, I'm thankful that I don't have a four year old to take care of and that I am free to walk in the morning. I am also thankful for mild weather year-round to walk in and a safe, gated community to walk around.
I am thankful that both my parents are still alive and doing well. I am thankful that my siblings are all still alive and that I have lost very few precious people in my life. Disease and illness can attack a body so quickly, that every day of health is a precious blessing. Today, hubby got the news that his recent stress test shows all is well, yet the evidence of a previous heart attack is there. A heart attack that awakens a person's perspective on life. I don't want a heart attack to happen to me and that is one of the reasons I am embarking on this life style change, to hopefully prevent heart disease and maybe other diseases as well. I am thankful for the health I have and will continue to improve.
Give thanks with a grateful heart! It will lift your spirits! Peace.
Too often we forget all the things we have to be thankful for. Just today, I was talking with a co-worker about walking in the morning. She has little energy at the end of the day to walk as we keep her a very busy woman at work as our department receptionist and go-for person. I mentioned walking in the morning, but she has a four year old to get up and get ready for school. I know she is thankful for that little guy and truthfully, I'm thankful that I don't have a four year old to take care of and that I am free to walk in the morning. I am also thankful for mild weather year-round to walk in and a safe, gated community to walk around.
I am thankful that both my parents are still alive and doing well. I am thankful that my siblings are all still alive and that I have lost very few precious people in my life. Disease and illness can attack a body so quickly, that every day of health is a precious blessing. Today, hubby got the news that his recent stress test shows all is well, yet the evidence of a previous heart attack is there. A heart attack that awakens a person's perspective on life. I don't want a heart attack to happen to me and that is one of the reasons I am embarking on this life style change, to hopefully prevent heart disease and maybe other diseases as well. I am thankful for the health I have and will continue to improve.
Give thanks with a grateful heart! It will lift your spirits! Peace.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Fun in the Sune
It was 100 degrees yesterday at Sea World in San Antonio and 100 thousand people there, it seemed! It was sunny and therefore a sweaty day. But we had fun viewing the shows and exhibits. The lines were too long for the water rides so we opted for long waits for the shows.
I quickly found myself doing child-like things like following the M.C.'s instructions to "wave at the whales." I laughed, took pictures, and enjoyed the antics and specialized training of the animals and the performers. It was a fun day, though next time we'll probably go there in the fall, when it's hopefully, cooler. The pool at the resort sure felt good last night. Hubby & I both slept well last night, even if it was only a double bed (compared to the king bed we are now accustomed).
One of the things that touched me at Sea World was the Shamu show, there was a video screen that showed the stories of young people that have grown to love whales and train whales. The theme was "Believe." The videos and testimonies were very well done and it focused on the children (and the inner child in we adults) to believe we can do something and make a difference in the world. At least one of the trainers has loved animals since a child and she truly is blessed to be working at something that is a "natural" for her. Sounds like something I have written before, the actions of children being reflected as they become adults. The video and the show strengthened my resolve to become something in my life. To become balanced and at peace in my life. Believe!
"I'm willing to believe there's hope for me." Peace!
I quickly found myself doing child-like things like following the M.C.'s instructions to "wave at the whales." I laughed, took pictures, and enjoyed the antics and specialized training of the animals and the performers. It was a fun day, though next time we'll probably go there in the fall, when it's hopefully, cooler. The pool at the resort sure felt good last night. Hubby & I both slept well last night, even if it was only a double bed (compared to the king bed we are now accustomed).
One of the things that touched me at Sea World was the Shamu show, there was a video screen that showed the stories of young people that have grown to love whales and train whales. The theme was "Believe." The videos and testimonies were very well done and it focused on the children (and the inner child in we adults) to believe we can do something and make a difference in the world. At least one of the trainers has loved animals since a child and she truly is blessed to be working at something that is a "natural" for her. Sounds like something I have written before, the actions of children being reflected as they become adults. The video and the show strengthened my resolve to become something in my life. To become balanced and at peace in my life. Believe!
"I'm willing to believe there's hope for me." Peace!
Friday, August 10, 2007
Spiritual
Yes, I'm still here! I have not written in a few days. Too much work at work, so my brain is fried when I get home. My morning walks have provided few thought-provoking thoughts, so I have skipped a few days of writing. However, I have been thinking about spirituality.
There's a phrase, "lifted my spirits," that reflects when we feel happier and lighter (as if someone is lifting us upward). The other day my sister's blog referred to her witnessing a beautiful sunrise. She called it "God's blessing." I got the impression that the sunrise lifted her spirits and it lifted mine just reading about it. My spirit is lifted when I witness a great view or sight and my spirit is further lifted if I can capture that view on my camera.
Other things that lift my spirit are kind words spoken to me, laughing, and having a good time. Watching a child having fun and enjoying themselves can lift the spirits of most anyone. I think that allowing myself to have fun as a child (of five years old that I once was) would, can lift my spirits. Don't get me wrong, my spirits are not low or I don't feel sad, I just think we should always take the opportunity to "lift our spirits" more! I plan to do just that tomorrow when we go to SeaWorld.
There is a phrase in the old hymn, How Great Thou Art, that says ".... then sings my soul." Having my soul sing is like having my spirits lifted, they both feel sooooo good!
There's a phrase, "lifted my spirits," that reflects when we feel happier and lighter (as if someone is lifting us upward). The other day my sister's blog referred to her witnessing a beautiful sunrise. She called it "God's blessing." I got the impression that the sunrise lifted her spirits and it lifted mine just reading about it. My spirit is lifted when I witness a great view or sight and my spirit is further lifted if I can capture that view on my camera.
Other things that lift my spirit are kind words spoken to me, laughing, and having a good time. Watching a child having fun and enjoying themselves can lift the spirits of most anyone. I think that allowing myself to have fun as a child (of five years old that I once was) would, can lift my spirits. Don't get me wrong, my spirits are not low or I don't feel sad, I just think we should always take the opportunity to "lift our spirits" more! I plan to do just that tomorrow when we go to SeaWorld.
There is a phrase in the old hymn, How Great Thou Art, that says ".... then sings my soul." Having my soul sing is like having my spirits lifted, they both feel sooooo good!
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Elephants
There is alcoholism in my family, my father and sisters have the disease. I have inherited the traits myself... traits that sometimes result in drinking too much and most of the time results in eating too much.
In the world of alcoholism, there is an analogy of how the alcoholic is a big elephant living in a family's house and how, due to it size it breaks china and rampages through the house causing havoc. Yet everyone in the family/house ignores the elephant. They tread lightly around the elephant. They don't say anything.... especially they don't say anything to cause the elephant to get upset and go on another rampage... or binge.
The world of over-eating is just the same. Our family and friends see us, the elephant, getting bigger and bigger... yet they ignore the elephant. They don't say anything, they don't want to hurt our feelings. They don't want the to cause the elephant to get upset and go on another rampage.... or binge.
Binge eating and binge drinking, the basis is the same... uncontrolled. Every time I allow my emotions to control my eating, I allow a binge to occur. A binge for me could be eating a bag of chips or it could be eating a cookie that I don't need. Large or small binge, a binge is a binge is a binge... let's call it what it is.
Getting back to elephants, my sister's blog yesterday tells of her nine-year-old son's wise words to her as she was frustrated with frantically trying to find paperwork in her "cluttered office." He said, "Mom, how would you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. You would need to chew and swallow before you could take another bite. So you can't run around doing a million things at once or your mouth is too full. You need to bite one. Get done and do the next one. OK? No more anger."
How true! How do we deal with elephant in our life - be it drinking, over-eating, or too much to do at work? One bite, one step, one day at a time, that's how!
In the world of alcoholism, there is an analogy of how the alcoholic is a big elephant living in a family's house and how, due to it size it breaks china and rampages through the house causing havoc. Yet everyone in the family/house ignores the elephant. They tread lightly around the elephant. They don't say anything.... especially they don't say anything to cause the elephant to get upset and go on another rampage... or binge.
The world of over-eating is just the same. Our family and friends see us, the elephant, getting bigger and bigger... yet they ignore the elephant. They don't say anything, they don't want to hurt our feelings. They don't want the to cause the elephant to get upset and go on another rampage.... or binge.
Binge eating and binge drinking, the basis is the same... uncontrolled. Every time I allow my emotions to control my eating, I allow a binge to occur. A binge for me could be eating a bag of chips or it could be eating a cookie that I don't need. Large or small binge, a binge is a binge is a binge... let's call it what it is.
Getting back to elephants, my sister's blog yesterday tells of her nine-year-old son's wise words to her as she was frustrated with frantically trying to find paperwork in her "cluttered office." He said, "Mom, how would you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. You would need to chew and swallow before you could take another bite. So you can't run around doing a million things at once or your mouth is too full. You need to bite one. Get done and do the next one. OK? No more anger."
How true! How do we deal with elephant in our life - be it drinking, over-eating, or too much to do at work? One bite, one step, one day at a time, that's how!
Monday, August 6, 2007
Emotional
After yesterday's blog and the personification of the aspects of my PES Project, I realized that I am an emotional eater. Emotional has become quite the enabler for me! Physically, I have not really craved food much, I have not been hungry much and I even enjoy the walking. However, that emotional side of me is whining, complaining, throwing-a-tantrum and wants to let me eat what I want, when I want and how much I want! If you could imagine.... Emotional is force-feeding Physical, shoving food in her face. Emotions are very strong.
Star Jones (formerly of The View TV show) says in Glamour magazine, "..... transparency is not humiliating - it is humbling..... In fact, true freedom and healing started to come when I began to talk about my (gastric bypass) surgery with strangers..... I'm not saying that in order to be happy, women need to be a certain size, but I am saying that we should all strive to be healthy.... When I feel myself reverting to that place of insecurity.... (I) remember what I know to be true: God did not bring me this far to leave me."
Lots of people like Star Jones and myself deal with our emotions, questioning how much do we show others? Yet our over-eating shows to everyone. Again Star makes a good point, "Funny - or sad - how we "thick" girls can justify being excessively overweight."
Mirrors don't tell the whole story, pictures do! I can look in the mirror every day and justify my rolls and bulges. But show me a picture of myself and it's "Oh my God! I'm that big?" Then my emotions take over and suggest food to comfort me, de-stress me, celebrate me. Funny, how ME is so prevalent in emotions and that first two letters of the word emotion is E and M or M and E. Yes, emotions are very strong and I'm going to need to take a strong stance to not give in to every emotional cry, whimper or shout. I'm going to need to do some tough-love self talk to my emotions. Emotional is a tough ol' girl, wish me luck!
Star Jones (formerly of The View TV show) says in Glamour magazine, "..... transparency is not humiliating - it is humbling..... In fact, true freedom and healing started to come when I began to talk about my (gastric bypass) surgery with strangers..... I'm not saying that in order to be happy, women need to be a certain size, but I am saying that we should all strive to be healthy.... When I feel myself reverting to that place of insecurity.... (I) remember what I know to be true: God did not bring me this far to leave me."
Lots of people like Star Jones and myself deal with our emotions, questioning how much do we show others? Yet our over-eating shows to everyone. Again Star makes a good point, "Funny - or sad - how we "thick" girls can justify being excessively overweight."
Mirrors don't tell the whole story, pictures do! I can look in the mirror every day and justify my rolls and bulges. But show me a picture of myself and it's "Oh my God! I'm that big?" Then my emotions take over and suggest food to comfort me, de-stress me, celebrate me. Funny, how ME is so prevalent in emotions and that first two letters of the word emotion is E and M or M and E. Yes, emotions are very strong and I'm going to need to take a strong stance to not give in to every emotional cry, whimper or shout. I'm going to need to do some tough-love self talk to my emotions. Emotional is a tough ol' girl, wish me luck!
Sunday, August 5, 2007
We had a PES Project team meeting this morning. We were reviewing how the team has come along since we started this project six weeks ago. To refresh your memory, we have three "people" on the project and their names are Physical, Emotional and Spiritual.
Any time you start a project, the people on the team have different functions depending on their personality. Projects start with a goal in mind and then everyone gives their input and help. The project usually start with brain-storming of ideas, suggestions, thoughts. Well, so much for "usual" in the PES Project.
We had Powerful (or Power-hungry) Physical was ready to get out the door before we even had a chance to brain-storm. She had her agenda, walk and weigh. She was bound and determined that would meet the goal of peace and balance for Rayna. Excited Emotional was on the band wagon quite quickly too. Thinking of all thoughts, feelings, and fears that Rayna would come up against. She decided that doing a daily blog would be beneficial to finding peace for Rayna. She grabbed onto Physical and off they went for a walk. Physical providing the power and Emotional providing the thoughts that excited Rayna and got her writing almost every day. They left behind Sleepy Spiritual complaining, "Why do you girls have to meet so early? I'm not ready to wake up yet, much less participate in this project." Spiritual was wondering, "Where is God in Rayna's life? Will she find what her heart and soul needs?"
As with all projects, all the team members are usually excited from the beginning. They come up with ideas and plans to meet the goal of the project. Then the planning is over and work must begin. Physical and Emotional started fighting about the best way and who's pulling their weight around here and who's not. Physical said, "This is no fun anymore, we have to work. It's not coming along as easily as I thought it would." Emotional was running on fumes, no more new ideas, it was hard for her to motivate any longer. They were both getting tired just as Spiritual starting waking up.
"Come on girls, there is hope for Rayna," Spiritual shouted. "Don't give up on this project!' Physical and Emotional raised their eyebrows and looked at Spiritual and said to her, "It's about time you did something on this project. What did you say? There is hope?"
"Yes, hope." Spiritual replied. The team members decided to pull themselves together and renew their efforts to get the PES Project back on track and going towards its goal. In fact, Physical walked 3 miles today so that Emotional had lots of time to work on the the minutes of this meeting. Spiritual was the cheerleader! :)
Any time you start a project, the people on the team have different functions depending on their personality. Projects start with a goal in mind and then everyone gives their input and help. The project usually start with brain-storming of ideas, suggestions, thoughts. Well, so much for "usual" in the PES Project.
We had Powerful (or Power-hungry) Physical was ready to get out the door before we even had a chance to brain-storm. She had her agenda, walk and weigh. She was bound and determined that would meet the goal of peace and balance for Rayna. Excited Emotional was on the band wagon quite quickly too. Thinking of all thoughts, feelings, and fears that Rayna would come up against. She decided that doing a daily blog would be beneficial to finding peace for Rayna. She grabbed onto Physical and off they went for a walk. Physical providing the power and Emotional providing the thoughts that excited Rayna and got her writing almost every day. They left behind Sleepy Spiritual complaining, "Why do you girls have to meet so early? I'm not ready to wake up yet, much less participate in this project." Spiritual was wondering, "Where is God in Rayna's life? Will she find what her heart and soul needs?"
As with all projects, all the team members are usually excited from the beginning. They come up with ideas and plans to meet the goal of the project. Then the planning is over and work must begin. Physical and Emotional started fighting about the best way and who's pulling their weight around here and who's not. Physical said, "This is no fun anymore, we have to work. It's not coming along as easily as I thought it would." Emotional was running on fumes, no more new ideas, it was hard for her to motivate any longer. They were both getting tired just as Spiritual starting waking up.
"Come on girls, there is hope for Rayna," Spiritual shouted. "Don't give up on this project!' Physical and Emotional raised their eyebrows and looked at Spiritual and said to her, "It's about time you did something on this project. What did you say? There is hope?"
"Yes, hope." Spiritual replied. The team members decided to pull themselves together and renew their efforts to get the PES Project back on track and going towards its goal. In fact, Physical walked 3 miles today so that Emotional had lots of time to work on the the minutes of this meeting. Spiritual was the cheerleader! :)
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Expectations
Expectations are the thoughts, feelings that the likely or for certain will occur. Such as when you take off in an airplane, you expect it will rise in the air and come down safely at your destination. You expect that your car will take you 60 miles in one hour down the roads of your journey. You expect that the bridge you are crossing will get you safely over the river. We expect those things to work for us. We take them for granted so much of the time. If we don't have these expectations, we probably live in fear and worry.
Isn't a bridge, an airplane, or a car just a miracle? Think about what man has created that assists us on our journeys to our destinations. The ingenuity it took man to create and continuously perfect the car, airplane and bridge. But as we all know, bridges, airplanes and cars don't always work the ways we expect. We expect that using the airplane, car or bridge will keep us safe and lead us to our destinations. However, we expect Mother Nature to give us floods, tornadoes, hurricanes, droughts or heat waves now and then. Since we can't control Mother Nature, we are so much more accepting of it's fury and what we'd call Mother Nature's negative aspects. Isn't it ironic that those things that man created and maintains, we expect only the best and most perfect from, yet those things we can't control such as weather, we expect the worst but hope for the best.
There is a verse in the Bible and I can't remember where, but the concept is about NOT putting your trust/faith in things made of man, but trust & have faith in God. Even long before cars and airplanes, man was being admonished to get their priorities right!
I don't think that getting our priorities right means that we need to fear getting into our cars and airplanes and traveling on the ground and in the air. I don't think that we need to fear going over every bridge we encounter. In fact, as much as the news about the bridge collapse in Minnesota saddened and concerned me, the next morning I got in my car and I went over several bridges (overpasses) and never once felt fearful, in fact I did not even think about the bridge collapse.
Getting my priorities right may mean that I need to expect that airplanes will sometimes fall to the ground, that a car will stop working or crash into another, that a bridge will fall. Getting my priorities right may mean that I need to believe that God was there holding people in His arms as the airplane, car or bridge crashed. I need to trust and hope that God was there for them. Getting my priorities right means that I need to believe, trust and hope that God is here for me. No matter what happens!
Isn't a bridge, an airplane, or a car just a miracle? Think about what man has created that assists us on our journeys to our destinations. The ingenuity it took man to create and continuously perfect the car, airplane and bridge. But as we all know, bridges, airplanes and cars don't always work the ways we expect. We expect that using the airplane, car or bridge will keep us safe and lead us to our destinations. However, we expect Mother Nature to give us floods, tornadoes, hurricanes, droughts or heat waves now and then. Since we can't control Mother Nature, we are so much more accepting of it's fury and what we'd call Mother Nature's negative aspects. Isn't it ironic that those things that man created and maintains, we expect only the best and most perfect from, yet those things we can't control such as weather, we expect the worst but hope for the best.
There is a verse in the Bible and I can't remember where, but the concept is about NOT putting your trust/faith in things made of man, but trust & have faith in God. Even long before cars and airplanes, man was being admonished to get their priorities right!
I don't think that getting our priorities right means that we need to fear getting into our cars and airplanes and traveling on the ground and in the air. I don't think that we need to fear going over every bridge we encounter. In fact, as much as the news about the bridge collapse in Minnesota saddened and concerned me, the next morning I got in my car and I went over several bridges (overpasses) and never once felt fearful, in fact I did not even think about the bridge collapse.
Getting my priorities right may mean that I need to expect that airplanes will sometimes fall to the ground, that a car will stop working or crash into another, that a bridge will fall. Getting my priorities right may mean that I need to believe that God was there holding people in His arms as the airplane, car or bridge crashed. I need to trust and hope that God was there for them. Getting my priorities right means that I need to believe, trust and hope that God is here for me. No matter what happens!
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
FRAGILE
FRAGILE HANDLE WITH CARE
Now and then we will see a package with this label. We know to pick it up carefully, not shaking it up. We are careful to open it so that we don't break or cut into the contents of the package. We are concerned about the contents, regardless if we know what's inside the package or not.
Now and then we will see the phrase, "life is fragile, handle with care." Is life easily broken? Is our connection to another person's life easily broken (fragile)? Yes, it can be... easily broken that is. We never know from one minute to another when a connection could be broken. Sometimes we have to just shake our heads at the enormity of the concept of losing someone in a split second.
Tonight, you may be watching the news channels and viewing the devastation of the bridge collapse in Minneapolis, Minnesota. I have traveled that bridge many times and hubby was on it twice each day when he commuted to his job in downtown Minneapolis for a year. It's been months since either of us was on that bridge, so I can rightly feel "safe." But Tim, my nephew, was on that bridge this morning and every morning that he travels to work. What if the bridge would have collapsed this morning instead of tonight? What if he would have left work late and decided to take that bridge to get home? What if I'm not aware yet if there were cousins or friends on that bridge? The "what ifs" of life make it seem so fragile, so easily broken.
To handle something with care, you must touch it. Touch those you love, physically with a hug and kiss. Touch those you love by calling them and doing what the old telephone commercial used to say, "reach out and touch." Don't be tossing that fragile package.... don't be tossing the concept of how important life is really. Life is fragile, handle with care! God bless all those victims, their families, and the rescue personnel.
Now and then we will see a package with this label. We know to pick it up carefully, not shaking it up. We are careful to open it so that we don't break or cut into the contents of the package. We are concerned about the contents, regardless if we know what's inside the package or not.
Now and then we will see the phrase, "life is fragile, handle with care." Is life easily broken? Is our connection to another person's life easily broken (fragile)? Yes, it can be... easily broken that is. We never know from one minute to another when a connection could be broken. Sometimes we have to just shake our heads at the enormity of the concept of losing someone in a split second.
Tonight, you may be watching the news channels and viewing the devastation of the bridge collapse in Minneapolis, Minnesota. I have traveled that bridge many times and hubby was on it twice each day when he commuted to his job in downtown Minneapolis for a year. It's been months since either of us was on that bridge, so I can rightly feel "safe." But Tim, my nephew, was on that bridge this morning and every morning that he travels to work. What if the bridge would have collapsed this morning instead of tonight? What if he would have left work late and decided to take that bridge to get home? What if I'm not aware yet if there were cousins or friends on that bridge? The "what ifs" of life make it seem so fragile, so easily broken.
To handle something with care, you must touch it. Touch those you love, physically with a hug and kiss. Touch those you love by calling them and doing what the old telephone commercial used to say, "reach out and touch." Don't be tossing that fragile package.... don't be tossing the concept of how important life is really. Life is fragile, handle with care! God bless all those victims, their families, and the rescue personnel.
Stinkin' Thinkin'
Stinkin' Thinkin' is a term that 12 step programs use to describe the type of thinking that leads to actions like overeating or drinking again.
I have been guilty of stinkin' thinkin' in the past week or so. Last week on Wednesday, I got on the scale and rejoiced that I had lost a couple more pounds. My first thought was, "Let's celebrate!" Then I wondered what food I would eat with which to celebrate. I got to thinking that with all the walking I'm doing, I can eat anything or everything I want. I have been very sloppy in my eating habits this past week. And I don't mean sloppy as in messy, but sloppy in my choices and portions.
Yes, my clothes are getting loose and that is reason to celebrate, but not with food. I have become very aware that I am a celebratory or a stress-reducer eater. Feeling high or low, give me food! This thinking that I "need" food to celebrate or compensate is not appropriate, it's stinking. It's a tough one to accept and/or battle, as it's been this way for me since I was a child or at least a teenager.
Both the scale today and a picture taken of me last Friday tell me that I have a long ways to go. But it starts one day at a time. It starts with the choices that I make on what and how much food and drink I will partake. It starts with accepting myself and acknowledging my thoughts. It starts with not allowing all my thoughts to lead to the action of choosing too much or the wrong kinds of food or drink. It starts with changing my thoughts if possible. I have to believe and remember that anything is possible.
I have been guilty of stinkin' thinkin' in the past week or so. Last week on Wednesday, I got on the scale and rejoiced that I had lost a couple more pounds. My first thought was, "Let's celebrate!" Then I wondered what food I would eat with which to celebrate. I got to thinking that with all the walking I'm doing, I can eat anything or everything I want. I have been very sloppy in my eating habits this past week. And I don't mean sloppy as in messy, but sloppy in my choices and portions.
Yes, my clothes are getting loose and that is reason to celebrate, but not with food. I have become very aware that I am a celebratory or a stress-reducer eater. Feeling high or low, give me food! This thinking that I "need" food to celebrate or compensate is not appropriate, it's stinking. It's a tough one to accept and/or battle, as it's been this way for me since I was a child or at least a teenager.
Both the scale today and a picture taken of me last Friday tell me that I have a long ways to go. But it starts one day at a time. It starts with the choices that I make on what and how much food and drink I will partake. It starts with accepting myself and acknowledging my thoughts. It starts with not allowing all my thoughts to lead to the action of choosing too much or the wrong kinds of food or drink. It starts with changing my thoughts if possible. I have to believe and remember that anything is possible.
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