Illumination

There is something magical about the Christmas season, the lights. Homes are decorated with lighted trees and yard ornaments fill the communities we live in. It's the time of year when the days of sunlight shorten more and more each day and just before Christmas day we have the most darkness. I am sure that may have been part of the reason for the tradition of lighting our homes at this time of year. It's a tradition that is appreciated by myself and many others as we ooo and aaw at the sight of the the lights. Hubby set up the timers on the outside lights so that they come on about the time I am taking my morning walk (in the dark). The lights create such a welcome-home feeling when I round the corner and see my house and yard. They illuminate the neighborhood. It puts a warm-fuzzy feeling in my heart.

To "shed some light on the subject" is a phrase describing illumination, or as Webster says, to "make understandable, clarify." My writing about my feelings of wanting to run-away basically laid the subject on the table. It was out there for anyone to read and see. Just writing about it made it easier for me to see it, it illuminated the taboo subject deep in my being. Once it was out in the open for me and others to see, it lost a lot of its power. It's no longer so scary. It's a feeling and we're all entitled to our feelings and thoughts. No one can take them away from us. No one can know what our feelings and thoughts are unless we choose to reveal them.

From the comments to that blog writing, I think I may have provided some illumination or light for others to see themselves. Sometimes the smallest light can brighten a room. It's not always easy or comfortable to see myself, much less reveal myself to others. I have some deep revelations in these blogs and some superficial nonsense in these blogs. Who is to judge what's a revelation versus nonsense? Even I can't know on some days and maybe I'm not meant to know.

Part of the longing in my soul is the need to fill up myself. I want to find the answer to, "Is this all there is to life?" So I fill myself up with food and drink or unhealthy habits or thoughts. I have always wanted to be a mentor to others in their struggles with life. I guess that's the counselor in me. Is there a way that I can use my words, thoughts, feelings to illuminate someones life? Can I fill my self with "light" and illuminate the path for someone else on their life's journey? Can I get my life in balance, physically, emotionally and spiritually so that my "project" could illuminate someone? Or perhaps I can illuminate someone by just struggling with the balancing act and never really succeeding, but trying none the less.

What is also exciting is the fact that we just never know who's life we may impact by shedding some of our light so that others can see! Each of us may be illuminating a path, totally unaware. Am I ready to hold the lantern of light or should I hide it for a while? Time will tell.