I have been struggling with a decision for awhile now and it's driving me crazy. I can't get into specifics in this blog as some people will think I have lost all my ability to think and reason. In other words, these "some" people will think I have truly gone crazy. For the record...the ability to think and reason is a definition of intellect.
Intuition, on the other hand, is the ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning. A lot of times, it's referred to as that "gut feeling" you get. Another way I might describe this dilemma is the Head versus the Heart. Make sense?
As a bit of background, if you don't already know it, I have a bit of "gypsy" blood in me. I can't stay or stand still in one place (job or residence) for very long before I get antsy and want change. I often think it's a character flaw in me. But then again, I would not have met all the people I have met and seen the places I have seen if I wasn't a bit of gypsy.
Some folks have said of me, "No moss grows under your feet." But shouldn't I be reaching the age of "settling down" soon? When I am dead and gone, put my ashes in a lake, river or ocean....someplace that I will still have a change of scenery! Ha-Ha!
Head vs Heart. Pros vs Cons. Even in reviewing what my head says, there are pros AND cons. Same thing with what my heart says. Oh, what do I do?
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
Making a List, Checking it Twice!
Making a list, checking it twice.....isn't that part of Christmas poem or song? Well, it was my story of last night's restlessness.
Yesterday, a comment on Facebook got me thinking of what I have done with my life and where I have been. Of course this thought process continued after lights-out! I was mentally making lists of what kind of jobs I had done; places I lived (24 cities/towns since high school); the number of airports I have flown into (43); longest time living in one place (almost 9 years at this address) and so on. I'm sure you get the drift! Before I knew it was 12:58 a.m. and sleep was evading me. I got up out of bed and spent a couple of hours on the computer looking at Facebook and playing games. Decided to go back to bed and sleep was still evasive! The time was 5:15 a.m. when I last looked at clock and then fell asleep. Surprisingly, I only slept until 8:20 a.m. and got up for the day.
No naps this afternoon either! Truthfully, I have not had a restless night like that in a very long time and I'm not sure what triggered it? It could have been a couple pieces of dark chocolate I had while watching TV last night. It could have been that I just had too much on my mind. It could have been the knee and shoulder pain I have been enduring lately. It could have been just a lesson to learn on how thankful I should be when I do sleep peacefully and for a long time!
Now that my lists are written down here and accounted for, I will plan on a taking a long, winter's nap tonight....oh, wait that's another Christmas poem or song!
Yesterday, a comment on Facebook got me thinking of what I have done with my life and where I have been. Of course this thought process continued after lights-out! I was mentally making lists of what kind of jobs I had done; places I lived (24 cities/towns since high school); the number of airports I have flown into (43); longest time living in one place (almost 9 years at this address) and so on. I'm sure you get the drift! Before I knew it was 12:58 a.m. and sleep was evading me. I got up out of bed and spent a couple of hours on the computer looking at Facebook and playing games. Decided to go back to bed and sleep was still evasive! The time was 5:15 a.m. when I last looked at clock and then fell asleep. Surprisingly, I only slept until 8:20 a.m. and got up for the day.
No naps this afternoon either! Truthfully, I have not had a restless night like that in a very long time and I'm not sure what triggered it? It could have been a couple pieces of dark chocolate I had while watching TV last night. It could have been that I just had too much on my mind. It could have been the knee and shoulder pain I have been enduring lately. It could have been just a lesson to learn on how thankful I should be when I do sleep peacefully and for a long time!
Now that my lists are written down here and accounted for, I will plan on a taking a long, winter's nap tonight....oh, wait that's another Christmas poem or song!
Monday, May 25, 2015
Sacrifice
I'm embarrassed to say that it's been years since I was attended a Memorial Day service. Since I live away from family and no picnics, get-together's or out-of-town trips are planned; I decided to attend the local ceremony in McAllen. McAllen has created an awesome memorial park next to the convention center.
This is just a small portion of the site. USA flags encircle the memorial and they were flying fully. Sometimes it was difficult to hear the speaker's words as the flags snapping in the wind created an overwhelming sound. It was almost as if the flags were punctuating the air with their authority and importance.
In the center of the memorial is the American Spire of Honor, quite impressive.
The keynote Speaker gave a tribute to a Korean War POW that died in 1950 during his capture. His brother was there to receive the awards.
The memorial site is almost under the incoming plane path for the local airport so it was fitting that an American Airlines plane was landing during the ceremony and I captured this shot.
The singing of "American Soldier," 21 guns salute and Taps bugle playing were awe-inspiring and brought tears to my eyes.
We Do Remember those who have given the ultimate sacrifice of their lives by fighting the enemies of the United States. All gave some and some gave all. The Vietnam War tore this country apart. The veterans returning were greeted with jeers, not cheers. We did not honor those men who came back with limbs missing and/or with hearts and minds broken and torn apart. Thankfully, today due to social media, I think we are much more aware of the many sacrifices that many veterans have given. Many of these veterans are at the forefront of fighting our government and our society for benefits to the soldiers returning from the war fronts of Iraq and Afghanistan, as well as their comrades from Vietnam War. Thank God!
As we were leaving the grounds, I noticed two gentlemen sitting on a bench talking and I asked if I could take their photo.
We struck up a conversation with them and found out they were classmates (1957) from the local, Pharr (PSJA) high school. They both served over thirty years in the Army - National Guard and Army Reserves. What an honor it was to meet them.
Saturday, May 23, 2015
Snakes!
Lions, tigers and bears, oh my! SNAKES Yikes!
What is it about snakes that gets our blood boiling, our nerves tingling and our muscles tensed?
My sister recently had a Facebook posting of her son killing a large snake in their back yard. There were a good number of comments of "Yuck" or "Yikes!" Why do we have an aversion to snakes? I think it's a centuries old aversion. The Bible correlates snakes/serpents to evil or the devil. But then again the logo for medical doctors has a snake on it. The medical logo goes back to Greek mythology and look it up on Google for more information, I did.
I think that most of us when we think of snakes, we have specific episodes in our lives that brought up the fear of snakes. I know I can remember as a young child, my mom chopping a snake in pieces that somehow found it's way into our house and on the kitchen counter. Sorry, younger siblings, you missed that everlasting memory! I can remember my grandfather's extreme fear of snakes that was evident when he saw a large, colorful, stuffed snake at a rummage sale and he went screaming out the door. Whoa! That was a surprise! Of course, his daughter, my mother transferred some of that fear onto her children. I remember the boy in grade school that found a garter snake and wrapped it around his neck. He made lots of friends, ha-ha. I remember last year at a historic site in New Mexico where we were warned by the Park Ranger to be especially careful and alert to where we were stepping. I did continue on the path with confidence that because I wanted to get a photo of a rattlesnake, I wouldn't see any. Of course, I was right.
Over the past twenty years, I have gotten less fearful of snakes. I can actually look at a picture of them or watch them on television. I used to always cover my eyes. Even though many people think the only good snake is a dead snake; I know that there are good snakes and bad snakes. Shortly after we moved to South Texas, we were at a wildlife refuge and saw a very large black snake. I even tried to get a photo, but it was too fast. At the visitor's center, we found out it's the Ebony snake, they are good, as they eat Rattlesnake eggs. OK, I can agree with that.
Last night there was a small snake by our front door, it was so small, we almost thought it was a large earthworm. I ventured out and saw it go into our flowers. I wish I could say that was the "last" of it. But, you know who had to wake up at 5:00 a.m. and wonder where did that snake go? So this morning, I looked up snakes of the Rio Grande Valley and found it. It's a Flat-Headed snake and yes, it is often mistaken for a large earthworm. Guess what? It likes to find it's way into houses through little openings in foundation and doors that are not airtight. Yikes! So much for acceptance of snakes....it just went out the door! In the door comes fear!
I have to take a deep breath and hope (and pray) that my less then nine years house has a solid foundation and no openings for large earthworms to enter the house. I will keep you posted. In the meantime have a wonderful holiday weekend and don't step on any snakes!
What is it about snakes that gets our blood boiling, our nerves tingling and our muscles tensed?
My sister recently had a Facebook posting of her son killing a large snake in their back yard. There were a good number of comments of "Yuck" or "Yikes!" Why do we have an aversion to snakes? I think it's a centuries old aversion. The Bible correlates snakes/serpents to evil or the devil. But then again the logo for medical doctors has a snake on it. The medical logo goes back to Greek mythology and look it up on Google for more information, I did.
I think that most of us when we think of snakes, we have specific episodes in our lives that brought up the fear of snakes. I know I can remember as a young child, my mom chopping a snake in pieces that somehow found it's way into our house and on the kitchen counter. Sorry, younger siblings, you missed that everlasting memory! I can remember my grandfather's extreme fear of snakes that was evident when he saw a large, colorful, stuffed snake at a rummage sale and he went screaming out the door. Whoa! That was a surprise! Of course, his daughter, my mother transferred some of that fear onto her children. I remember the boy in grade school that found a garter snake and wrapped it around his neck. He made lots of friends, ha-ha. I remember last year at a historic site in New Mexico where we were warned by the Park Ranger to be especially careful and alert to where we were stepping. I did continue on the path with confidence that because I wanted to get a photo of a rattlesnake, I wouldn't see any. Of course, I was right.
Over the past twenty years, I have gotten less fearful of snakes. I can actually look at a picture of them or watch them on television. I used to always cover my eyes. Even though many people think the only good snake is a dead snake; I know that there are good snakes and bad snakes. Shortly after we moved to South Texas, we were at a wildlife refuge and saw a very large black snake. I even tried to get a photo, but it was too fast. At the visitor's center, we found out it's the Ebony snake, they are good, as they eat Rattlesnake eggs. OK, I can agree with that.
Last night there was a small snake by our front door, it was so small, we almost thought it was a large earthworm. I ventured out and saw it go into our flowers. I wish I could say that was the "last" of it. But, you know who had to wake up at 5:00 a.m. and wonder where did that snake go? So this morning, I looked up snakes of the Rio Grande Valley and found it. It's a Flat-Headed snake and yes, it is often mistaken for a large earthworm. Guess what? It likes to find it's way into houses through little openings in foundation and doors that are not airtight. Yikes! So much for acceptance of snakes....it just went out the door! In the door comes fear!
I have to take a deep breath and hope (and pray) that my less then nine years house has a solid foundation and no openings for large earthworms to enter the house. I will keep you posted. In the meantime have a wonderful holiday weekend and don't step on any snakes!
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
Milestones
Recently, I had a lot of "alone" time as I was driving by myself from Texas to Wisconsin and back again. I used MapQuest, the Garmin, road signs and my odometer to see how many miles I had gone and how many miles I had to go to my destination each day. I used these instruments as my "milestones - A stone marker set up on a roadside to indicate the distance in miles from a given point." And as I drove alone, I thought of other "milestones - An important event or turning point in one's history or career."
My first milestone in life, that I remember, was turning six years old so that I could go to school. My school did not have kindergarten. Although I enjoyed school, in my teens I couldn't wait until I graduated from high school and could then go to college. In college, I eagerly awaited turning 21 years so that I could legally drink. After college, it was time to eagerly awaiting getting married and that was a long wait! Are you sensing a trend here....me waiting for the next milestone?
For some reason, I have a habit of looking into the future and eagerly waiting certain milestones that I have designated for me.... 50th birthday (celebrated with a good old-fashioned picnic and children's games); 62nd birthday (eligible for Social Security benefits); retirement; and now I'm eagerly awaiting 65th birthday so I can get on Medicare.
Yikes! What then? Death! Oh, I feel that I'm in trouble here and I feel sad. I have been waiting for my life to go by so I could get to the next milestone and IT HAS! I'm on a roller-coaster going down hill and it's FAST! It was so evident on this trip up North when I saw my siblings (now three of us over sixty) and nieces and nephews in their 30's. My only living maternal aunt is 90 and my dad's four living siblings are all over 80 now. Where did the time go? I have been so eager to hit those milestones that I have gotten old, but now I don't like it very much. The years have flown by, no matter how much I thought they had dragged on and on.
Don't get me wrong....I've had a very fulfilling life....good career and lots of traveling. Now, it's time to rein in this roller-coaster life and slow down a bit. It may be time to re-set my priorities. It may be time to realize that whatever time I have left in life, I will explore and expand my horizons. Who knows, maybe that "roller-coaster" does not end at the bottom of that hill...maybe it goes up again so I can experience more thrills in my life. I only have today, tomorrow is not promised, and yesterday is full of wonderful memories.
My first milestone in life, that I remember, was turning six years old so that I could go to school. My school did not have kindergarten. Although I enjoyed school, in my teens I couldn't wait until I graduated from high school and could then go to college. In college, I eagerly awaited turning 21 years so that I could legally drink. After college, it was time to eagerly awaiting getting married and that was a long wait! Are you sensing a trend here....me waiting for the next milestone?
For some reason, I have a habit of looking into the future and eagerly waiting certain milestones that I have designated for me.... 50th birthday (celebrated with a good old-fashioned picnic and children's games); 62nd birthday (eligible for Social Security benefits); retirement; and now I'm eagerly awaiting 65th birthday so I can get on Medicare.
Yikes! What then? Death! Oh, I feel that I'm in trouble here and I feel sad. I have been waiting for my life to go by so I could get to the next milestone and IT HAS! I'm on a roller-coaster going down hill and it's FAST! It was so evident on this trip up North when I saw my siblings (now three of us over sixty) and nieces and nephews in their 30's. My only living maternal aunt is 90 and my dad's four living siblings are all over 80 now. Where did the time go? I have been so eager to hit those milestones that I have gotten old, but now I don't like it very much. The years have flown by, no matter how much I thought they had dragged on and on.
Don't get me wrong....I've had a very fulfilling life....good career and lots of traveling. Now, it's time to rein in this roller-coaster life and slow down a bit. It may be time to re-set my priorities. It may be time to realize that whatever time I have left in life, I will explore and expand my horizons. Who knows, maybe that "roller-coaster" does not end at the bottom of that hill...maybe it goes up again so I can experience more thrills in my life. I only have today, tomorrow is not promised, and yesterday is full of wonderful memories.
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